What to do when you're giving parents money?

I have been working since I was 14. Since then I have cost my mother very little money except in school fees and other educational items (books etc.). When she started her own business she went from a fairly high income to one where we're basically a low-income single parent family. After I finished school I was able to take on more work and I started topping up the family finances because I didn't want my little sister to have to do without.





I've gotten to the point with my mother where I am effectively considered the "second income" in our family making up for the fact that my father hasn't given us a dime. I don't want to move out and leave my little sister to have very little, but my mother won't consider my advice to consolidate her high-interest credit cards because she feels too embarrassed to talk about money. She now wants me to fund an overseas holiday for the three of us. Long term, I could afford it but I'm worried that I'll never save any money for things that I would like (car, house etc).





I don't want to abandon my family but I don't know how to help them and myself at the same time. I have NO savings for 7 years of work.|||NO WAY should you fund a family vacation! I understand your concern for your sister. But she is your mother's responsibility, not yours. Sit your mother down and tell her that you will not fund a vacation; and you will move out and stop helping financially unless she does something about her finances. If you are in the states, go to daveramsey.com. Sign your mother and yourself up for Financial Peace University. There will probably be several in your area, one night a week. This is the beginning to a whole new way of looking at your money. If it doesn't help both you and your mom, it can't be done. Please, go now..|||I admire you for using your resources to help provide for your family. That being said,I'll be damned if my mother who won't consider my advise to consolidate her high interest credit cards is gonna try to get me to over-spend on an overseas holiday. Thats it! There are better things to spend your money on or things to save for. That's all I have to say about that!|||You don't need to waste money on holiday. Helping your family stay afloat is one thing, spending money on expensive trips is another. If your mom can ask you to pay for a holiday, she can talk about money with you. If it were me, I would give my sister money to stay where she needs to be, and let my MOM (who should know how to care of herself by now) figure it out.|||In some respects your mum is being selfish. You will need an income to support yourself and your future needs.Compromise and save money for a short holday.You will have to put your foot down .What happens if you marry? Have a family of your own to support.For now help out with the essrntials such as paying your share of living costs and put some away.|||seeing that you are officially the second income in the house, you opinion should matter, and you shouldn't be spending money on vacations when that money could be put to better use.|||Move ot. Take your sister with u. PARTY|||No, don't do it. It's time for you to start to make a plan to move out. Let you mom deal with her own finances. Get your sister things now and then, but its time to let her handle things. I had the same issue with my much older parents. They won't talk about finances yet want me to pay for certain things. Nope, not happening. If they stopped giving money to my useless brother, they would have plenty. My money goes where I want it to go, not down the drain to a loser. You are starting out your life and you need to get to living it, not taking care of your mother. She can take care of herself.|||I had a similar situation with my mom and sister. I didn't want to leave either. I actually got married, and we still stayed to help them out. It was not working. Finally we did move out and almost instantly their finances improved, and I am not under all that pressure. There comes a time where you have to realize that you don't have to stay on a sinking ship. That is what your mom is choosing at the moment, but you don't have to stay aboard. You have to live your life, and you can't change how she chooses to live hers. Your mom and sister can make it. You have to give them the chance.